Hi, I'm a 16 year old guy, I have an ethical/personal advice question: Is it bad to masturbate to a very close (female) friend?
I recently got out of a long, very sexual relationship that lacked any real connection, so i'd like to be in a more emotion/personality based one for a while. I have an extremely close friend, and neither of us is interested in a sexual relationship, should we ever go out, although i have a strong emotional bond with her, and her with me.
However, when i masturbate, sometimes her face or thoughts about her will come to my mind if i allow them, but i suppress it instantly, because it seems like it would be disrespectful to her. I also avoid thinking about her physical appearance (although she's very pretty) in a sexual way, or having any fantasies about her, as these also seem disrespectful to her.
I mentioned my dilemma to a friend who doesn't know her, and he said I was being stupid and should go ahead and do so.
What I'm asking is, should I allow myself to think about her like that (or specifically to come to orgasm fantasizing about her), or would it, like, alter my subconscious perception of her or make me desire a sexual relationship, or would help to relieve any mental tension that has been building up towards her in my mind? Please help me!Ethical / personal advice needed! Any opinions appreciated!?
I don't really think that it would be disrespectful at all... unless you were to make it that way by talking about it with other people. Or telling her that you masturbate while you think of her. Those are two things you shouldn't do. :) If you don't do that, then I think it's okay to think about her. People are attracted to who they're attracted to for whatever reason. I don't see why sexual attraction would be considered disrespectful. :)
Friday, April 30, 2010
Friend's work/personal dilemma- advice please!!!!?
This really is a 'friend' (ie not me). She has asked me for advice and I don't know what to tell her. So input from you would be welcome.
She and her boyfriend were given the position as ';host management couple'; at a resort, but only as the backup couple in case the fullterm host couple can;t host for whatever reason. Her boyfriend supplements this income by being a tour guide. they live at the resort.
They soon discovered that the full-time host couple are threatened by them and try to make their lives difficult. Furthermore, the head tour guide has been hitting on my friend from day one. As her boyfriend works under him, she took a long time before complaining. Now that she has laid a complaint, this guy is victimising her boyfriend by not giving him work. Also, the owners of the resort have demoted them as backup host couple ';until the situation is resolved';.
They both really need the cash but are very unhappy and don't know what to do.Friend's work/personal dilemma- advice please!!!!?
Find new jobs.
Really, the owner has chosen sides (the current host couple) and they will never overcome this mess.
Finding new jobs is the way to go.Friend's work/personal dilemma- advice please!!!!?
I think this is a no-brainer, The chips are stacked against them in this particular work situation, The owners of the resort clearly don't want to take their side in this matter - and probably don't know what to think about who is doing what to whom. All the resort owners are interested in is keeping their business running smoothly. Only one realistic thing to do here. Your friend and her boyfriend will just have to pack their bags, call it a day, and find employment elsewhere. Surely this is not the ONLY kind of work they can do. I am sure it's great to be able to work at a recreational resort, but in this very conflictive situation things are only going to go from bad to worse if they try to tough it out under these awkward circumstances.
Firstly you need evidence that this is happening, and witness statements if possible. Don't know which country this is happening in but it is a breach of employment in virtually every western country. Employment tribunals in the UK will always find in favour of the employee if they can substantiate the claim. Get legal advice.
Seek alternative employment
move on quickly, there is no happy ending here, find other jobs. good luck!!!
if u frens work condition is miserable its not fun.... everyday they woke up and the strain shows..... its just waiting for either of them to snap.... and ruins the guests holiday.....
why dont u fren try working on a cruise ship..... plenty of fun on a moving city and the management is more focus...
good luck
If there are many factors depleting this situation as a source of income and comfort... time to look for another job. If there is no hope to repair this...they should seek a new resort, with a fine resume before they get in a position where this resort can ';blackball'; them.
What a horrible position to be in. Their best bet would be to start looking for another job elsewhere as it seems that their boss has reprimanded them instead of the man that could possibly cause a lawsuit with his sexual harassment. In the meantime, they should document everything that happens, especially if the advances are continuing. If they have enough things documented, approach the manager again.
Did their boss ever tell them how he expects to ';resolve'; this situation? If not, I would calmly and politely inquire with him what actions he is thinking of taking or expecting them to take. (But, seeing as it sounds like he has already chosen his side, they need to be prepared that they might not like the answer).
They could maybe try speaking with him about transferring to another department within the resort if that is a possibility.
Best of luck to them.
As hard as it will be, they need to leave their current positions due to the difficult work situation. It's not very easy to work with your significant other in the first place, much less when there's someone else causing problems in the work place. If your friends value their relationship and respect each other then they will leave their posts. It sounds like they really need their job, as well as the extra work as a tour guide, but their private lives are more important than a job. No job is worth being miserable. People spend way too much time at work to be miserable. However, I will suggest that neither of them quit their job before having another one lined up.
Move on.
Tell your friend to outline her complaints in a letter to the owners of the resort. A letter sent registered makes the owners understand that your friend takes this situation seriously. Realistically, this situation can't be resolved to your friends' satisfaction without the people causing the problem being removed from their jobs. Since that's unlikely, your friends should start looking for other jobs asap.
She and her boyfriend were given the position as ';host management couple'; at a resort, but only as the backup couple in case the fullterm host couple can;t host for whatever reason. Her boyfriend supplements this income by being a tour guide. they live at the resort.
They soon discovered that the full-time host couple are threatened by them and try to make their lives difficult. Furthermore, the head tour guide has been hitting on my friend from day one. As her boyfriend works under him, she took a long time before complaining. Now that she has laid a complaint, this guy is victimising her boyfriend by not giving him work. Also, the owners of the resort have demoted them as backup host couple ';until the situation is resolved';.
They both really need the cash but are very unhappy and don't know what to do.Friend's work/personal dilemma- advice please!!!!?
Find new jobs.
Really, the owner has chosen sides (the current host couple) and they will never overcome this mess.
Finding new jobs is the way to go.Friend's work/personal dilemma- advice please!!!!?
I think this is a no-brainer, The chips are stacked against them in this particular work situation, The owners of the resort clearly don't want to take their side in this matter - and probably don't know what to think about who is doing what to whom. All the resort owners are interested in is keeping their business running smoothly. Only one realistic thing to do here. Your friend and her boyfriend will just have to pack their bags, call it a day, and find employment elsewhere. Surely this is not the ONLY kind of work they can do. I am sure it's great to be able to work at a recreational resort, but in this very conflictive situation things are only going to go from bad to worse if they try to tough it out under these awkward circumstances.
Firstly you need evidence that this is happening, and witness statements if possible. Don't know which country this is happening in but it is a breach of employment in virtually every western country. Employment tribunals in the UK will always find in favour of the employee if they can substantiate the claim. Get legal advice.
Seek alternative employment
move on quickly, there is no happy ending here, find other jobs. good luck!!!
if u frens work condition is miserable its not fun.... everyday they woke up and the strain shows..... its just waiting for either of them to snap.... and ruins the guests holiday.....
why dont u fren try working on a cruise ship..... plenty of fun on a moving city and the management is more focus...
good luck
If there are many factors depleting this situation as a source of income and comfort... time to look for another job. If there is no hope to repair this...they should seek a new resort, with a fine resume before they get in a position where this resort can ';blackball'; them.
What a horrible position to be in. Their best bet would be to start looking for another job elsewhere as it seems that their boss has reprimanded them instead of the man that could possibly cause a lawsuit with his sexual harassment. In the meantime, they should document everything that happens, especially if the advances are continuing. If they have enough things documented, approach the manager again.
Did their boss ever tell them how he expects to ';resolve'; this situation? If not, I would calmly and politely inquire with him what actions he is thinking of taking or expecting them to take. (But, seeing as it sounds like he has already chosen his side, they need to be prepared that they might not like the answer).
They could maybe try speaking with him about transferring to another department within the resort if that is a possibility.
Best of luck to them.
As hard as it will be, they need to leave their current positions due to the difficult work situation. It's not very easy to work with your significant other in the first place, much less when there's someone else causing problems in the work place. If your friends value their relationship and respect each other then they will leave their posts. It sounds like they really need their job, as well as the extra work as a tour guide, but their private lives are more important than a job. No job is worth being miserable. People spend way too much time at work to be miserable. However, I will suggest that neither of them quit their job before having another one lined up.
Move on.
Tell your friend to outline her complaints in a letter to the owners of the resort. A letter sent registered makes the owners understand that your friend takes this situation seriously. Realistically, this situation can't be resolved to your friends' satisfaction without the people causing the problem being removed from their jobs. Since that's unlikely, your friends should start looking for other jobs asap.
Help; personal advice; dieting?
can anyone please tell me what i should do.
well i started dieting when i was 9 because my mom used to tell me that i am fat and so on, by the time i was 15 i used to starve my self and binge eat one day in the week till i literally lose conscious, i stopped lossing weight although i wasn't that think and no one would guess that i am that person except my friends who kept telling me that it was wrong, anyway before i go to college one of my friends told me that i was no fun eating with because i obess about food repeat i am fat to my self more that 500 times a day so i decided to stop, i began slowly and soon i was a normal person,,, anyway 6 month ago i had a lot of problems and was a bit depressed ( not cliniclly i mean not diagnosed by a doctor
) although i am a cheerful person, i isolated myself from every one and starting gaining weight, i only smiled while watching anime,,, anyway i am not depressed anymore, still trying to get back to my former self but i can't stop eating.Help; personal advice; dieting?
the world depresses me . eating is one of the few things i truly enjoy.an escape. then i decided my eating was getting out of control so even tho i can't change the world i can change my eating.
i already had all the info to change my eating i just had to put it into practice. so i started counting calories and using the zigzag/calorie shifting diet to lose a lb a week and still eat what i like in 4 to 6meals but just control the portions.
best source i know for stopping habitual eating is site below because it has good psychological techniques to stop the bad habits and to motivate and promote the positive habits.
thru the techniques i have set goals that in the past i didn't think were achievable for me and so far so good.stella mccartney
well i started dieting when i was 9 because my mom used to tell me that i am fat and so on, by the time i was 15 i used to starve my self and binge eat one day in the week till i literally lose conscious, i stopped lossing weight although i wasn't that think and no one would guess that i am that person except my friends who kept telling me that it was wrong, anyway before i go to college one of my friends told me that i was no fun eating with because i obess about food repeat i am fat to my self more that 500 times a day so i decided to stop, i began slowly and soon i was a normal person,,, anyway 6 month ago i had a lot of problems and was a bit depressed ( not cliniclly i mean not diagnosed by a doctor
) although i am a cheerful person, i isolated myself from every one and starting gaining weight, i only smiled while watching anime,,, anyway i am not depressed anymore, still trying to get back to my former self but i can't stop eating.Help; personal advice; dieting?
the world depresses me . eating is one of the few things i truly enjoy.an escape. then i decided my eating was getting out of control so even tho i can't change the world i can change my eating.
i already had all the info to change my eating i just had to put it into practice. so i started counting calories and using the zigzag/calorie shifting diet to lose a lb a week and still eat what i like in 4 to 6meals but just control the portions.
best source i know for stopping habitual eating is site below because it has good psychological techniques to stop the bad habits and to motivate and promote the positive habits.
thru the techniques i have set goals that in the past i didn't think were achievable for me and so far so good.
Need personal advice on army physical fitness?
I want to be at 300 by the time I ship out...which is a little over two months from now. I'm in terrible shape. As a 25 year old male and I need to do 75 army style push ups in a single set, 80 army style sit ups in a single set, and run 2 miles in 13 minutes flat. After testing myself I did 30 army style pushups in a single set, 20 army style sit ups in a single set and ran a mile in 7 minutes. Can I do it with the time alloted, and if so, any tips or advice?Need personal advice on army physical fitness?
To do that in 2 months?? You're kind of pushing it. You would do better to have at least 4 or 5 months, so regardless of how you train, you might not accomplish this goal.
To get better at push ups, you're going to have to do a LOT of push ups. If you can do 30, try doing 20, then rest 2 minutes, then do 20, then rest 2 minutes, and repeat. Do 3 sets of 20 in the morning and in the afternoon each day. As it steadily becomes easier, add between 3 to 5 reps every day.
The point here is to NOT REACH FAILURE. Hitting failure taxes the CNS, which makes adaptions from further sets more difficult. Simply by doing push ups, and not hitting failure, you build the kind of neural connections you need to continually do an activity until failure. If you think I'm BSing you, go here: http://www.themedicalhelp.com/forum/view鈥?/a> - click on the last link you see in the list, and read about GTG training.
This same thing applies to your sit ups. To get better at it, if all you can do is 20, try hitting 15 repeatedly. You could super set that with your push up training if you want.
To improve your running time, you're better off trying a different modality. You'd do best by applying the Law of Overload to how you run. The only way you can do this is through a HIIT type protocol - for 2 to 3 minutes, run at a pace faster than you can normally maintain for the entire mile. You should not be able to maintain the same speed for longer than 3 minutes. When you simply CANNOT run anymore, reduce your speed and jog for 1 or 2 minutes. After this time, increase your speed again to what it was before, and aim for another 2 to 3 minutes. This will cut your running time down dramatically, and you most likely CAN accomplish this in 2 months. Again, if you think I'm BSing you, see http://www.brianmac.co.uk/fartlek.htm .
The push ups and sit ups I'm not sure though. Depends in part on how faithfully you do them.
If you have anymore questions, just email me at zendreams@gmail.com .Need personal advice on army physical fitness?
First off, thank you for what you do for our country. You can def. get into ';army'; shape in 2 months. My brother is an officer in the army and he said during bct there was a girl who could not do a single push up but by the end of bct she was firing off REAL push ups like it was nothing. so, my advice is to basically smoke yourself everyday. your bound to get stronger and faster. in order to get your 2 mile faster i would start doing some interval training jog for 1-2 min, run for 1-2 min, full out sprint for 1-2 min then keep repeating this will def. help you get faster. at the beginning of the week run the 2 mile as fast as possible then intervals for the rest of the week then at the end of the week run the 2 mile again. as for the push ups and sit ups every day just try and do more than the day before. push yourself like crazy. when you say 'ship out' do you mean ship out over seas or ship out to bct? at first i assumed over seas but, seeing as you said your in terrible shape im guessing bct now...?
To do that in 2 months?? You're kind of pushing it. You would do better to have at least 4 or 5 months, so regardless of how you train, you might not accomplish this goal.
To get better at push ups, you're going to have to do a LOT of push ups. If you can do 30, try doing 20, then rest 2 minutes, then do 20, then rest 2 minutes, and repeat. Do 3 sets of 20 in the morning and in the afternoon each day. As it steadily becomes easier, add between 3 to 5 reps every day.
The point here is to NOT REACH FAILURE. Hitting failure taxes the CNS, which makes adaptions from further sets more difficult. Simply by doing push ups, and not hitting failure, you build the kind of neural connections you need to continually do an activity until failure. If you think I'm BSing you, go here: http://www.themedicalhelp.com/forum/view鈥?/a> - click on the last link you see in the list, and read about GTG training.
This same thing applies to your sit ups. To get better at it, if all you can do is 20, try hitting 15 repeatedly. You could super set that with your push up training if you want.
To improve your running time, you're better off trying a different modality. You'd do best by applying the Law of Overload to how you run. The only way you can do this is through a HIIT type protocol - for 2 to 3 minutes, run at a pace faster than you can normally maintain for the entire mile. You should not be able to maintain the same speed for longer than 3 minutes. When you simply CANNOT run anymore, reduce your speed and jog for 1 or 2 minutes. After this time, increase your speed again to what it was before, and aim for another 2 to 3 minutes. This will cut your running time down dramatically, and you most likely CAN accomplish this in 2 months. Again, if you think I'm BSing you, see http://www.brianmac.co.uk/fartlek.htm .
The push ups and sit ups I'm not sure though. Depends in part on how faithfully you do them.
If you have anymore questions, just email me at zendreams@gmail.com .Need personal advice on army physical fitness?
First off, thank you for what you do for our country. You can def. get into ';army'; shape in 2 months. My brother is an officer in the army and he said during bct there was a girl who could not do a single push up but by the end of bct she was firing off REAL push ups like it was nothing. so, my advice is to basically smoke yourself everyday. your bound to get stronger and faster. in order to get your 2 mile faster i would start doing some interval training jog for 1-2 min, run for 1-2 min, full out sprint for 1-2 min then keep repeating this will def. help you get faster. at the beginning of the week run the 2 mile as fast as possible then intervals for the rest of the week then at the end of the week run the 2 mile again. as for the push ups and sit ups every day just try and do more than the day before. push yourself like crazy. when you say 'ship out' do you mean ship out over seas or ship out to bct? at first i assumed over seas but, seeing as you said your in terrible shape im guessing bct now...?
Personal advice needed about my partner's private parts?
sorry I do not want to be explicit but do need some advice.
Sex has proved to be quite an unfulfilling experience for me as my partner has quite a small member - about 4.5 inches.
I came on this site before and asked about alternative positions but none of those work for me either. My partner mentioned to me that other women have never had orgasms with him and that his last partner found sex unsatisfying and he could not work out why.
Obviously I am not going to point out this shortcoming to him but I am at a loss as to what to do. For people who say that this sort of thing should not matter they are wrong. I do love my partner but it is clear that this has been a problem for the other women in his life as well as he has told me that did not enjoy sex.
I wish that I could talk about this with him without hurting his feelings.
Personal advice needed about my partner's private parts?
Well the average for a male is 10.5 inches.
As this is average there will obviously be some of us bigger and some, like hubby, smaller. Seems your hubby comes under the category of smaller.
.Personal advice needed about my partner's private parts?
Open comunication= adult relationship, if you can't talk then your in a childish relationship.
just talk to him about it, and their are many other sexual things he can do to you other than vaginal intercourse.
BTW, the average adult male penis is 5-6.5 inches, just be glad hes not superrr small.
Technique and not size is the key to this. A guy with a small penis is just as good at sex as a guy with a huge one provided he knows what to do with it. Anyway 4.5 to 5.5 is the average, anyone who says diffeent is lying.
I think it's time to Upsize your combo meal, if you know what i mean.
ummm...................
well you could talk about it with him but with almost all men , their ego lies in their member as you put it. If it was something you COULD work out then you could try chatting to him, but there is no solution.
Like someone said on here, you dont need a big member to have a good sex life. He could compensate with his hands, his toungue ...u know...
Dont mean to put you down but the love you have for him isnt unconditional, if this problem isnt sorted out soon then i feel your goina break up with him (otherwise you wouldnt have come here and posted this issue). Indirectly suggest ways to spice up the sex life, while hes doing it you could...give a few pointers? he might get offended by that...so no matter what you do his feelings are goina get hurt.
Choice is yours.
Well, love and sex are seperate and different.. Can you sacrifice not having what you want? Ask for more oral pleasures.. and buy yourself a nice TOY.. any size you want and ask your lover AFTER he does his unfilling job..( dont SAY THAT TO HIM..... EVER.. I MEAN NEVER)
and ask him to play with you .. with it..
Keep it going and do say to him you want him to keep going.. with the toy.. until the job is finished..
You need to be creative and not expect the satisifaction from just the part. you need to figure out how to get where you are going.. by doing other things. otherwise honey.. move on and find what you want.. out there..
Sex has proved to be quite an unfulfilling experience for me as my partner has quite a small member - about 4.5 inches.
I came on this site before and asked about alternative positions but none of those work for me either. My partner mentioned to me that other women have never had orgasms with him and that his last partner found sex unsatisfying and he could not work out why.
Obviously I am not going to point out this shortcoming to him but I am at a loss as to what to do. For people who say that this sort of thing should not matter they are wrong. I do love my partner but it is clear that this has been a problem for the other women in his life as well as he has told me that did not enjoy sex.
I wish that I could talk about this with him without hurting his feelings.
Personal advice needed about my partner's private parts?
Well the average for a male is 10.5 inches.
As this is average there will obviously be some of us bigger and some, like hubby, smaller. Seems your hubby comes under the category of smaller.
.Personal advice needed about my partner's private parts?
Open comunication= adult relationship, if you can't talk then your in a childish relationship.
just talk to him about it, and their are many other sexual things he can do to you other than vaginal intercourse.
BTW, the average adult male penis is 5-6.5 inches, just be glad hes not superrr small.
Technique and not size is the key to this. A guy with a small penis is just as good at sex as a guy with a huge one provided he knows what to do with it. Anyway 4.5 to 5.5 is the average, anyone who says diffeent is lying.
I think it's time to Upsize your combo meal, if you know what i mean.
ummm...................
well you could talk about it with him but with almost all men , their ego lies in their member as you put it. If it was something you COULD work out then you could try chatting to him, but there is no solution.
Like someone said on here, you dont need a big member to have a good sex life. He could compensate with his hands, his toungue ...u know...
Dont mean to put you down but the love you have for him isnt unconditional, if this problem isnt sorted out soon then i feel your goina break up with him (otherwise you wouldnt have come here and posted this issue). Indirectly suggest ways to spice up the sex life, while hes doing it you could...give a few pointers? he might get offended by that...so no matter what you do his feelings are goina get hurt.
Choice is yours.
Well, love and sex are seperate and different.. Can you sacrifice not having what you want? Ask for more oral pleasures.. and buy yourself a nice TOY.. any size you want and ask your lover AFTER he does his unfilling job..( dont SAY THAT TO HIM..... EVER.. I MEAN NEVER)
and ask him to play with you .. with it..
Keep it going and do say to him you want him to keep going.. with the toy.. until the job is finished..
You need to be creative and not expect the satisifaction from just the part. you need to figure out how to get where you are going.. by doing other things. otherwise honey.. move on and find what you want.. out there..
I had a phone interview today, personal interview tomorrow. Any good advice out there for me?
The position is for a veterinarian assistant and technician. For me, this is an AWESOME opportunity because they aren't requiring past experience. They are willing to train the right person. Whoever gets the job will not only take care of admissions, but will also assist the doctor with animal surgeries. I am very excited and do NOT want to flub this one up. I have been looking for FT work since April...
Give me some really good pointers?
For starters, when she asks, ';why do you want to work for a vet?'; I don't want to sound like a flaky little kid and say something stupid like, ';oh I wanna work with doggies and kitties and animals...';
I want her (doc/vet) to know how serious I am about wanting this job, that I am a mature and responsible individual.
Please advise.I had a phone interview today, personal interview tomorrow. Any good advice out there for me?
My first piece of advice for you is take a deep breath, and remain calm. They already like the way you presented on the phone, so as long as you maintain the successful things that worked in that portion of the interview, you should come out with flying colors:)
A good general strategy for interviewing is to find an area in which you connect on a deeper level with the interviewer. If you are in that person's office, most likely they will have some type of personal memorabilia that is important to them-family pictures, awards, certificates, hobbies. IMPORTANT NOTE: If the things that the person has displayed are of no interest to you at all, DON'T PRETEND that they are. Not only is that blatantly a suck up move that should be pretty obvious, but it could also land you in every quilting bee or marathon this person ever does after they hire you.
That runs me into another point-POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE. You should walk into that interview expecting that the job is already yours, not in a cocky way, but in a confident way. Interviews are not the timefor you to be humble-gracious always, but not humble. This company wants to know why they should pay you money to perform tasks for them every day, and you should exude the confidence that no matter what those tasks are you are willing to complete them or learn how to complete them and then complete them.
Do not be afraid to ask for the job-if this is the position you want, show them that. Ask questions about the rest of the interview process, find out how many other candidates they are considering, find out what their timetable is for making a hire, book a specific time to get feedback from them after the interview-always book another meeting from a meeting. Don't come off desperate, but definitely be aggressive and assertive.
With that being said, A great answer to the question ';why do you want to work for a vet'; is your interest in the field. Talk about personal experiences you may have had with animals, and how that has impacted your life and desire to work with them. Remember, facts tell, but stories sell! Talk about your strengths, and how they will best benefit her practice. Willingness to learn as well as ability to pick things up quickly are two things hiring people want to hear with entry level candidates. Since all entry level candidates use those types of buzzwords, differentiate yourself by giving specific examples of your strengths ini action.
Last thing-if you walk into the interview and are feeling overly nervous, just imagine anyone/everyone in the room wearing pink and purple polka dot underwear. It may sound silly, but it has helped me in situations from piano recitals to athletic events to corporate presentations.
Have a great interview!I had a phone interview today, personal interview tomorrow. Any good advice out there for me?
No problem, glad that i could help and encourage you:)
Then let that show through. What ARE your reasons for wanting that specific position? A love for animals, wanting to make a difference, looking for something redeeming, fun, and challenging? Be honest, smile, and make good eye contact. If you show a genuine desire to learn that field, you've got a good edge.
[I'd omit the part about having been looking for a full-time job for the past few months without success, though. . . And at no point should you allude to the fact that you're just in it for the money. That SHOULD go without saying, but you may be surprised. :) ]
sounds like you're on the right track if they want a face to face interviews.
when they ask why you want to work for a vet, tell them you have an affinity for the care %26amp; well-being of pets. there's no shame in wanting to work with doggies %26amp; kitties. ;-)
also, in the interview, make eye contact while talking to them, but don't stare...
Give me some really good pointers?
For starters, when she asks, ';why do you want to work for a vet?'; I don't want to sound like a flaky little kid and say something stupid like, ';oh I wanna work with doggies and kitties and animals...';
I want her (doc/vet) to know how serious I am about wanting this job, that I am a mature and responsible individual.
Please advise.I had a phone interview today, personal interview tomorrow. Any good advice out there for me?
My first piece of advice for you is take a deep breath, and remain calm. They already like the way you presented on the phone, so as long as you maintain the successful things that worked in that portion of the interview, you should come out with flying colors:)
A good general strategy for interviewing is to find an area in which you connect on a deeper level with the interviewer. If you are in that person's office, most likely they will have some type of personal memorabilia that is important to them-family pictures, awards, certificates, hobbies. IMPORTANT NOTE: If the things that the person has displayed are of no interest to you at all, DON'T PRETEND that they are. Not only is that blatantly a suck up move that should be pretty obvious, but it could also land you in every quilting bee or marathon this person ever does after they hire you.
That runs me into another point-POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE. You should walk into that interview expecting that the job is already yours, not in a cocky way, but in a confident way. Interviews are not the timefor you to be humble-gracious always, but not humble. This company wants to know why they should pay you money to perform tasks for them every day, and you should exude the confidence that no matter what those tasks are you are willing to complete them or learn how to complete them and then complete them.
Do not be afraid to ask for the job-if this is the position you want, show them that. Ask questions about the rest of the interview process, find out how many other candidates they are considering, find out what their timetable is for making a hire, book a specific time to get feedback from them after the interview-always book another meeting from a meeting. Don't come off desperate, but definitely be aggressive and assertive.
With that being said, A great answer to the question ';why do you want to work for a vet'; is your interest in the field. Talk about personal experiences you may have had with animals, and how that has impacted your life and desire to work with them. Remember, facts tell, but stories sell! Talk about your strengths, and how they will best benefit her practice. Willingness to learn as well as ability to pick things up quickly are two things hiring people want to hear with entry level candidates. Since all entry level candidates use those types of buzzwords, differentiate yourself by giving specific examples of your strengths ini action.
Last thing-if you walk into the interview and are feeling overly nervous, just imagine anyone/everyone in the room wearing pink and purple polka dot underwear. It may sound silly, but it has helped me in situations from piano recitals to athletic events to corporate presentations.
Have a great interview!I had a phone interview today, personal interview tomorrow. Any good advice out there for me?
No problem, glad that i could help and encourage you:)
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Then let that show through. What ARE your reasons for wanting that specific position? A love for animals, wanting to make a difference, looking for something redeeming, fun, and challenging? Be honest, smile, and make good eye contact. If you show a genuine desire to learn that field, you've got a good edge.
[I'd omit the part about having been looking for a full-time job for the past few months without success, though. . . And at no point should you allude to the fact that you're just in it for the money. That SHOULD go without saying, but you may be surprised. :) ]
sounds like you're on the right track if they want a face to face interviews.
when they ask why you want to work for a vet, tell them you have an affinity for the care %26amp; well-being of pets. there's no shame in wanting to work with doggies %26amp; kitties. ;-)
also, in the interview, make eye contact while talking to them, but don't stare...
Personal advice needed???? Please :(?
Why am i feeling this way? Someone help me?
I am a firm believer of while taking Anti-depressants you have a hard time finding attachment/love/emotions towards anything or anyone. At 23 years old I feel life has become so hard on me. I have been through many tragic events over the past 4 years, from losing my mother, grandfather and being in ICU after a bad car accident life has really been an ongoing struggle. About 3.5 years ago right after my mother passed away I began taking Anti-depressant medication first lexapro and now zoloft. Through these times I have found myself to be cold hearted and emotionless towards my family and my previous and current girl fiend. I am like a walking zombie with my arms out looking to feel some form of emotion. I pack my life with going to school, working and eating to keep away from these ongoing negative thoughts that eat at my brain on a daily basis. These obsessive thoughts are all focused on my girlfriend and I make her out to be someone she is not. When I first met her I was crazy over how she looked and treated me and now that two years have passed, its actually gotten a lot better but my mind and body will not accept it. I tell myself she is ugly, not good enough for me, and this confuses the crap out of me. If I were to draw you a person who I would want to be my wife without question it would be her. We do share the same qualities, outlooks on life and get along very well for the most part. In my past relationships and the current one, i feel the need to push people away and because I have no feelings- Its an escape from having to deal with any of this. I turn to inter coarse and other sexual activities to bring out some type of feelings. I am struggling so bad with this and it hurts so much, you have no idea. I would like to hear what you would have to say about this. I thank you very much for giving me your time. Hope to hear from you soon.
Ps: I got to counseling and my grl is away on vac for a month and the questions of wether or not I love her are still obsessive amongst my thoughts. I let her on great terms. My mind doesnt want me to have a connection- So i constantly look at other girls and compare them to her...always thinking the grass is greener on the other sidePersonal advice needed???? Please :(?
well i've been taking anti-depressants since age 14 (17 now) i hate dthem having to depend on them for emotion an dhappiness sucked and i even thought of suicid eat one point and even no wi'm still lost co zi wonder how i'm gonna get along with ppl for th erest of my life coz i think no one likes me but all u can do is just pray and hope for the best and try to think back to a time when u were happy i know its extremely tough to lose a parent and i'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo鈥?sorry about that so very sorry my heartfelt condolences my heart goes out for u and i do know what its like ok i do coz i'm experiencing it right now but most times i take out my anger on my dressing i mourn for the life i never had i mourn for the life i want to have but dont just sit there try to help urself too it works try to tell urself that u are worth it and try to tell urself that soemone is good enough for you thats all i hope i helped a bitPersonal advice needed???? Please :(?
were yyou ever sexuallyy abused? if so this can be a trigger.
the thoughts in yyour head cannot be sent awayy unless yyou make them.
i go through the same thing but much worse. im living in myy nightmare and cannot wake.
yyou need to talk to someone that is not a psycho-analysis-er [:
[im here if yyou do need to talk]
the feelings you are feeling are normal but need to be taken highlyy
u have faced a lot of life problem and i can feel it in my mind. just ignore your previous problem and let your current matters matter! i know it is easy for me to say but try it!
i hope u will be alright soon.stella mccartney
I am a firm believer of while taking Anti-depressants you have a hard time finding attachment/love/emotions towards anything or anyone. At 23 years old I feel life has become so hard on me. I have been through many tragic events over the past 4 years, from losing my mother, grandfather and being in ICU after a bad car accident life has really been an ongoing struggle. About 3.5 years ago right after my mother passed away I began taking Anti-depressant medication first lexapro and now zoloft. Through these times I have found myself to be cold hearted and emotionless towards my family and my previous and current girl fiend. I am like a walking zombie with my arms out looking to feel some form of emotion. I pack my life with going to school, working and eating to keep away from these ongoing negative thoughts that eat at my brain on a daily basis. These obsessive thoughts are all focused on my girlfriend and I make her out to be someone she is not. When I first met her I was crazy over how she looked and treated me and now that two years have passed, its actually gotten a lot better but my mind and body will not accept it. I tell myself she is ugly, not good enough for me, and this confuses the crap out of me. If I were to draw you a person who I would want to be my wife without question it would be her. We do share the same qualities, outlooks on life and get along very well for the most part. In my past relationships and the current one, i feel the need to push people away and because I have no feelings- Its an escape from having to deal with any of this. I turn to inter coarse and other sexual activities to bring out some type of feelings. I am struggling so bad with this and it hurts so much, you have no idea. I would like to hear what you would have to say about this. I thank you very much for giving me your time. Hope to hear from you soon.
Ps: I got to counseling and my grl is away on vac for a month and the questions of wether or not I love her are still obsessive amongst my thoughts. I let her on great terms. My mind doesnt want me to have a connection- So i constantly look at other girls and compare them to her...always thinking the grass is greener on the other sidePersonal advice needed???? Please :(?
well i've been taking anti-depressants since age 14 (17 now) i hate dthem having to depend on them for emotion an dhappiness sucked and i even thought of suicid eat one point and even no wi'm still lost co zi wonder how i'm gonna get along with ppl for th erest of my life coz i think no one likes me but all u can do is just pray and hope for the best and try to think back to a time when u were happy i know its extremely tough to lose a parent and i'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo鈥?sorry about that so very sorry my heartfelt condolences my heart goes out for u and i do know what its like ok i do coz i'm experiencing it right now but most times i take out my anger on my dressing i mourn for the life i never had i mourn for the life i want to have but dont just sit there try to help urself too it works try to tell urself that u are worth it and try to tell urself that soemone is good enough for you thats all i hope i helped a bitPersonal advice needed???? Please :(?
were yyou ever sexuallyy abused? if so this can be a trigger.
the thoughts in yyour head cannot be sent awayy unless yyou make them.
i go through the same thing but much worse. im living in myy nightmare and cannot wake.
yyou need to talk to someone that is not a psycho-analysis-er [:
[im here if yyou do need to talk]
the feelings you are feeling are normal but need to be taken highlyy
u have faced a lot of life problem and i can feel it in my mind. just ignore your previous problem and let your current matters matter! i know it is easy for me to say but try it!
i hope u will be alright soon.
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